Categories
Interior

Overloaded at work here’s how to cope

Share

Overloaded at work here's how to cope

Many of us take on more work than we are able to cope with which can lead to extreme pressure and stress. We may take on more than we can manage due to concerns around job insecurity or because we struggle to say no to our manager or colleagues. Whatever the cause, multiple studies have shown a considerable number of us feel mounting stress from demanding workloads, and the more stressed we feel, the lower our productivity and overall wellbeing.

Here are a few key techniques to cope with work overload so that you can try and bring your to-do list to a manageable level.

1. Manage your time

When your workload increases, it’s more important than ever to practise effective time management. One of your time management main goals should be to recognise your priorities and focus on them, so that the most important jobs get finished before their deadlines. That could mean you’ll have to put jobs that aren’t high priority to one side, or even drop them altogether.

Get lots of other tips on boosting your efficiency and productivity by reading our article 5 things you should know about time management.

2. Wipe out bad work habits

Lots of little things you do during the day may add up to a major waste of your time, such as reading junk email, surfing the internet and chatting with co-workers. You may also think you’re using your time wisely by doing lots of preparation and research for a project. But in reality, what you may be doing is putting off starting the work itself.

Identify all your time-wasting habits by writing down everything you do during your working day for a week. You’ll soon see how much more time you could devote to realising your deadlines if you cut out or changed those small habits.

3. Make a list of everything you have to do

If you tend to work on several things at the same time, a to-do list is essential. So write down all the tasks you have to do and rate them 0-5, where 0 is the least important and 5 is top priority. Once you’ve done that, work through the tasks on your list one by one, concentrating on the higher-priority tasks first. Making a list can also help you recognise that you have too much to do in too short a time. If that’s the case, concentrate on the next steps.

4. Don’t try to do it all

You’re not a super hero, so don’t try to achieve everything on your own. Lighten your workload by learning to delegate to others who may not be as swamped with deadlines as you are. Now may also be the time to call in favours from co-workers who you helped when they were under pressure.

5. Learn to say ‘no’

If your workload is already sky high, taking on even more tasks could mean you won’t be able to complete any of them to a high enough standard. Stop and think before you agree to take on any new deadlines – only commit to those that are essential. If you decline politely, your employer and colleagues will understand.

6. Don’t let it overwhelm you

When things feel like they are getting on top of you, find a quiet space or even at your desk, shut your eyes, clear your mind and just focus on your breathing. Aim for four seconds breathing in and four seconds breathing out. Do this for a minute or more and just keep focusing on your breath and your body as you inhale and exhale. You should feel the stress begin to wash away which will prevent you from being too frantic and will not only help productivity – which is reduced by stress – but is also good for your health in the long run.

How CABA can help

Our CABA advisors can also help at times when work or personal stress is getting you down.

CABA supports the wellbeing of past and present ICAEW members, ACA students, ICAEW staff members, and their spouses, partners and children up to the age of 25. For advice, information and support please:

Overloaded at work here's how to cope

If it seems like you’re always stretched too thin and never have enough time to complete your work before three new projects are handed down to you — always with the instructions that they’re high-priority — you probably need to talk with your manager about your workload. But with more companies expecting people to do more with less, how can you talk about this in a way that your manager will listen to? Here are five steps to talking to your manager when your workload is overwhelming.

1. Don’t assume that your manager knows how high your workload is. Your manager can’t help you if she doesn’t realize that there’s a problem. A common mistake in this situation is to assume that your workload is so obviously high that there’s no way that your manager doesn’t know, and so therefore she must not care or can’t do anything about it. But in reality, you’re the person paying the most attention to your workload, not your manager — and she may assume that since you’re not speaking up, there isn’t a problem. So…

2. Talk to your manager about the situation. Pick a time when your manager isn’t rushed and ask to talk about your workload. Explain that it has become unmanageable and why (for instance, that you’ve taken on the responsibilities of someone who left without anything being removed from your plate, or that a particular account has doubled in size in the last year). Explaining what’s behind the workload increase can help because your manager may not be focused on the facts as you.

3. Suggest options. You’re most likely to get the help that you need if you come prepared to talk about options. For instance, you might say, “I can do A and B, but not C. Or if C is really important, I’d want to move A off my plate to make room for it. Alternately, I can act as an adviser to Jane on C, but I can’t do the work of C myself if I’m also doing A and B.”

4. Frame it as a matter of making the best choices. If your manager resists making these kinds of trade-offs, you need to keep pushing the issue. Say, “I hear you that we want it all to get done, but since I’m never going to be able to get to it all, I want to make strategic choices about how I should be structuring my time, and make sure that you and I are aligned on those choices.” If your manager won’t help you prioritize, then come up with your own proposal for what you will and won’t prioritize and ask her to tweak it or OK it.

5. Enforce boundaries. To take on something new when your plate is already full, you need to either get rid of something else or at least push it back. So if a new project comes your way, go to your manager and ask about trade-offs: “If I work on this now, it means that X and Y will have to pushed back by a week. Is that OK to do, or should we put this new work on hold until X and Y are finished first?” Or, “I can do this new project and X, or this new project and Y, but not all three in the time frame we have.”

One important note: The above should work with a reasonable manager – and even with a somewhat reasonable manager. If you have a manager who listens to everything here and tells you to just find a way to get everything done, then you’re working for a bad manager (or alternately, you aren’t working as quickly as others in the position, in which case a good manager might push back). If that’s the case, you’ll need to be realistic about your circumstances and decide how you want to respond.

Alison Green writes the popular Ask a Manager blog, where she dispenses advice on career, job search, and management issues. She’s also the co-author of Managing to Change the World: The Nonprofit Manager’s Guide to Getting Results, and former chief of staff of a successful nonprofit organization, where she oversaw day-to-day staff management, hiring, firing, and employee development.

From saying ‘no’ to understanding what triggers your stress – our experts share advice on how to stop feeling overloaded

  • Considering changing jobs? Explore the range of vacancies on Guardian Jobs and find the perfect role for you

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness, says Sarah Connell. Photograph: Getty Images

Asking for help is not a sign of weakness, says Sarah Connell. Photograph: Getty Images

Last modified on Tue 30 Oct 2018 08.23 GMT

Understand the triggers

When you are feeling overwhelmed at work, it is important find out why you feel that way. Do you have too many responsibilities, or feel there are too few hours in the day? Is your boss piling on the pressure? Or is the company culture getting you down?

“Feeling overwhelmed is actually a stress response when we feel the demand on us outweighs our resources,” says Diana Dawson, career psychologist and owner of Working Career. Feeling out of control and under pressure is a form of emotional overloading and can also trigger the release of stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline, she says.

Keeping a journal of thoughts, feelings and actions can help you identify what causes this reaction, she adds. “Once we understand what triggers the stress, we can perhaps understand why that is and we can build strategies around those things.”

Don’t suffer in silence

If your workload is unmanageable, it’s a good idea to speak to your boss. This can be a daunting prospect, but making a plan before your discussion will help. Revisit your job description before the meeting. “Explain to your boss the tasks you are involved in, how long they take, the resources they require, why you find them challenging, and practical suggestions for a solution,” suggests Sarah Connell, a business psychologist and founder of MindingMe Psychologists.

“Try to control your emotions in the meeting, remain calm and professional. Focus on concerns about quality to demonstrate you are still committed to doing a good job,” she says. “It is not a sign of weakness, asking for help, and your manager may not realise how much work you have on.”

David Webb, writer and editor at employment relations specialist Acas, says that if your boss is professional, you should get a positive reaction when raising the issue. “The situation may be because of a temporary factor you are unaware of, and they may be able to help in some way.” This is an ideal scenario, but unfortunately not always the case. “If a bad boss is putting extra work on you without caring, then that’s a more difficult situation,” he says. In these circumstances, it is worth speaking to a trade union or employee representative and look into the company’s grievance procedure.

Learn to say no

The ability to say no “is probably my top tip for life as well as work,” says psychotherapist and life coach Hilda Burke. Often people who say yes to everything have this instilled in them in childhood, she explains, because they think if they do not obey rules they will be rejected. In a working environment people might think they are lucky to have a job, so it is best to keep their head down and not fuss, she says. “Challenging this type of work programming can take some time, but it can be done.”

Pushing back can particularly hard for freelancers, however, who often take on more than they can handle because of financial uncertainty. “I understand the temptation to say yes to new projects, but if it gets to a point where your existing projects or clients are suffering then it’s time to take stock,” says Burke.

She suggests buddying up with another freelancer or colleague that you trust to help with the workload. “Saying no shows your busy already, which can be a good message to give out,” she says.

Put things into perspective

Changing the way you think about your work situation could help alleviate some of the pressure, says Connell. “Remember the important things in life and do not let yourself get carried away with stresses.” She suggests trying cognitive behavioural therapy and mindfulness techniques. “They cannot resolve the work situation, but instead are aimed at helping you manage how you think about it and how you cope from a personal perspective.”

At times of intense work, it’s more important than ever to look after your physical and emotional self

When you are feeling stressed at work, you should leave this emotional baggage in the office. “Remember it’s just a job. Don’t take it home with you, switch off email and phone alerts when you’re at home and plan some fun stuff outside work,” says Sarah Archer, career coach and co-founder of CareerTree.

Take breaks and relax

Feeling overwhelmed at work can send you into survival mode, which becomes counterproductive. “Stress actually closes off the more creative parts of our cognitive processes and also distorts our perception of time,” says Gary Wood, psychologist, life coach and author.

While it may seem counterintuitive, taking time out to relax during the working day will help lighten a heavy workload. “The temptation is to work without breaks. The reality is that it depletes our resources and we process things more slowly and make more mistakes. The brain likes breaks.”

It is also necessary to look after yourself outside of work. “A lot of my clients, when they get very stressed during busy times at work, start eating junk food and abandoning their exercise regimes. The result is they sleep poorly and feel even worse,” says Burke. “At times of intense work, it’s more important than ever to look after your physical and emotional self.”

Move on

If you have exhausted all your options, and you are still struggling, then it might be worth looking for a new job. “If [a stressful job] doesn’t make you ill it can erode your confidence in your own abilities, which then makes it harder to leave and find another job.”

When looking for a new role, it is worth researching a company’s work culture, so you do not find yourself in the same situation. Sites like Glassdoor survey workplaces, and also ask about management style during job interviews, suggests Archer.

Looking for a job? Browse Guardian Jobs or sign up to Guardian Careers for the latest job vacancies and career advice

In my view the biggest challenge when you’re self-employed is coping with work overload. There is always more to do than time available for doing it and it can quickly become overwhelming to the point where you feel paralysed trying to work out what to do next.

But while it’s difficult to reduce the workload at times, you can do a few things to help get you through the blockage.

Go for easy targets

One of the key things I find when I feel overwhelmed by work is that the to do list looks very long indeed but most of the tasks on it will (usually) be small jobs that will take a short but undetermined length of time.

If you can get some of these out of the way then you’ll start feeling a little less paralysed by the sheer volume of stuff. Even better is that almost all of these little tasks won’t take nearly as long as you think they will.

Technically, even big jobs are really a series of smaller jobs but we’ll cover that elsewhere.

Cut out distractions

This is an age-old time management technique but it’s as true as ever.

The key here is to give yourself the maximum possible chance of being able to focus. And that means switching off things such as your phone, your email, any social media, the radio, and anything else that will take your attention away from the tasks at hand.

I’m going to be writing an article dedicated to this since, if you get it right, you’ll increase your productivity and cut your stress levels immensely.

Delegate

One of the most straightforward things is to simply delegate some of your work to others.

If you’re the manager of a team or the owner of a business where you have a staff then you should only be doing the tasks that are fit for your role.

A good example of this was when I went to visit a friend who is a successful business owner. His secretary told me he was doing a spot of plumbing and I found him trying to fix a toilet.

The first thing out my mouth was something like “What the heck do you think you’re doing?” I went on to remind him that his time was worth hundreds of pounds an hour and that he should stop what he’s doing and get his secretary to phone a plumber to come and sort it out.

This situation had arisen because he was so used to getting involved in his business that he didn’t even think that fixing toilets was a complete waste of his time and expertise. The job needed to be done, but he really wasn’t the one that needed to be doing it.

In fact, this situation is very common among business owners who’ve run their business from its inception.

If you’re a solo-entrepreneur (i.e. self-employed) things are slightly different. You may not have staff but you can still quite easily delegate to subcontractors.

A simple example is book-keeping, get someone else to do it (unless you’re an actual book-keeper). You could also add repetitive admin tasks and telephone answering.

How many hours would it save you if someone else answered the phone for you and handled things like book-keeping?

In my website design business I started this process by contracting out graphic design work. I can do design but I realised that I’m not very efficient at it.

Paying someone else to do it for me freed up a huge number of hours to focus on other stuff like client management, sales and product development.

It it very much worth the money and our levels of customer satisfaction increased considerably.

So, hopefully one or more of those tips will give you something to work on if you’re having a hard time coping with work overload.

Let us know in the comments if you’ve any quick tips for coping with work overload, it would be great to hear from you.

Overloaded at work here's how to cope

After reading an early version of a new book, I decided to do a quick survey during a speaking engagement. I asked the audience, “How many of you feel overworked and overwhelmed?”

As far as I could tell, every hand was raised.

That’s what I expected. We all feel overworked. We all feel overwhelmed, at least some of the time. (Even if by other people’s standards we have it easy, we still feel overworked.)

Effectively managing our professional and personal lives is a problem we all struggle with. Maybe that’s because we look outside ourselves for solutions: software, apps, devices, time management systems, etc.

All of those can help, but as Scott Eblin, author of Overworked and Overwhelmed: The Mindfulness Alternative, says, “The only person who is going to keep you from feeling overworked and overwhelmed is you.”

So how do you pull it off? It starts with making one overriding commitment: You must commit to intentionally managing your time so you have a fighting chance of showing up at your best–your most inspired, your most productive, and your most “in the flow.”

So how do you do that? Here are Scott’s tips:

1. Recognize and overcome the tyranny of the present.

People who are always “in the moment” don’t look ahead and make plans to pursue their goals and dreams. Though there are certainly things you need to do every day, much of what you think you need to do isn’t particularly important–especially where your long-term goals are concerned.

That’s why you should.

2. Ask, “Is this really necessary?”

Challenge your basic assumptions about your regular habits. Do you need to have that meeting? Do you need to create that report? Do you need to respond to that email? In many cases you don’t, but you do anyway simply because that’s what you’ve always done.

Eliminate as many “nice to do” tasks as possible–not only will you have more time, you’ll also have more time to be effective where it really matters.

3. Push reset on your calendar.

Sometimes the answer to “Is this really necessary?” is “Yes, but not right now.” What is the most important thing you need to do today? What tasks will keep you from getting that done?

The same is true if something important pops up: Immediately reset your calendar and reprioritize. Getting stuff done is fine, but getting the right stuff done is what really matters.

4. Understand and set your operating rhythm.

We all work differently. Some like to hit the ground running. Others like to start the day by reflecting, meditating, and thinking. Some like to work into the night.

The key is to understand not just how you like to work but also how you work best. You might like to work late at night, but if you’re tired or frazzled by a long day, you won’t perform at your best.

Do some experiments to figure out what works best for you. While you won’t always be able to stick to your plan, you will always have a plan to return to.

5. Schedule the most important tasks first.

What are your priorities for the month? The week? Today? Determine what they are and do those things first.

Why would you work on less important tasks when the truly important items are where you create the most value–whether for your business or your life?

6. Give yourself time for unconscious thought.

Giving yourself time for unconscious thought is key to making smart decisions when you face complex problems. Research shows people tend to make their best decisions when they have an opportunity to review the data and facts and then focus their thought on something else for a while.

How? Take a walk. Do a mindless chore. Exercise. Do something where your body goes on autopilot and your mind does too. You’ll be surprised by the solutions you can dream up when you aren’t purposely trying to be creative.

7. Set boundaries.

No one can or should be on 24/7. Yet you probably feel you are–because you allow yourself to be.

Set some boundaries: the time you’ll stop working, certain times you’ll do things with your family, certain times you won’t take calls, etc. Then let people know those boundaries.

Other people won’t respect your time unless you respect your time first.

8. Be strategic with “yes” and “no.”

You can’t say yes to everything. (Well, you can, but you won’t get everything you say yes to done–so in effect you’re still saying no.)

Sometimes you simply need to say no. Other times you can say, “No, unless. ” and add stipulations. The same is true with yes: Saying, “Yes, but only if. ” creates guidelines.

Always consider the effect of a request on your most important goals. An automatic yes also automatically takes time away from what you need to get done.

9. Tame your distractions.

Most people are distracted over 30 times an hour: phone calls, emails, texts, office drop-ins. The list is endless.

Schedule blocks of time when you’ll turn off alerts. The only way to stay on schedule is to work on your own schedule–not on that of other people.

10. Remember your impact on other people.

If you’re a leader–and since you run a business, you definitely are–you naturally impact other people. You set a direction. You set a standard.

You’re a role model.

Be a great role model: a person who gets important tasks done, who stays on point, who focuses on achieving goals and dreams . and who helps other people achieve their goals and dreams.

That’s reason enough to manage your time so you’re consistently at your best.

Battling With Digital Overload? Here Are 5 Strategies To Help You Cope

Published on September 16, 2020 – By Cecilia Amador de San José

You’ve probably heard of Zoom fatigue. But are you aware of the term digital overload?

Digital overload has been an issue for some years. But nowadays, with the onset of the pandemic and remote work, people are more connected than ever before.

While there are plenty of benefits to being connected — among them the ability to work remotely and collaborate virtually — there are plenty of downsides.

As workers are encouraged to use various online platforms to stay connected with coworkers and managers, digital overload is increasingly becoming all too common.

Try to count how many notifications you have received in the last hour on your phone, tablet, laptop, and smartwatch. The truth is we are all being constantly bombarded with messages, alerts, and notifications… even at times when we are trying our hardest to focus.

Unsurprisingly, digital overload leads to procrastination. It also affects our mental health.

Back in 2015, an HBR article argued that:

“This culture of constant connection takes a toll both professionally and personally. We waste time, attention, and energy on relatively unimportant information and interactions, staying busy but producing little of value.”

Digital Overload: More Harm than Good

When workers regularly need to spread their focus thin on a variety of tasks, from checking emails and answering Slack messages, to high-focus work, the result is more often than not reduced productivity, lack of engagement, and burnout.

The effects of digital overload go well beyond lack of productivity. Increased use of our phones, laptops, and tablets can lead to eye strain, which in turn can cause headaches, fogginess, and tiredness.

Remote work is here to stay, which means that workers will need to learn to better manage their digital load to ensure that they are performing at their best and to keep their wellbeing in check.

Unfortunately, getting rid of digital platforms is not an option. While organizations would do well to rethink their remote work strategy and choose their platforms wisely, the reality is that workers will still need to be digitally available in order to do their work remotely.

So, what can workers do about this?

Fighting Digital Overload

Technology is a double edged sword. The first step to avoid digital overload is to find ways in which you control the technology you use, rather than letting technology control you.

Tips for when you’re feeling overloaded.

Posted Feb 22, 2018

Overloaded at work here's how to cope

Here are some strategies for when you’re feeling overwhelmed by work. These are aimed at helping you feel more confident and settled, so that you’re able to concentrate and focus better.

These strategies can help in situations in which your motivation is too high (you feel mentally scattered because there is so much you want to be doing) or your motivation is too low (everything feels pointless, or you feel hopeless about achieving anything meaningful.)

None of these strategies will be right for every situation, but by developing a toolkit of strategies, you’ll always have at least one suitable strategy on hand. By having a variety of tools at your disposable, you’re more likely to have one that both feels doable and is likely to work in any given situation.

1. Finish something you started but didn’t complete.

If I need to settle myself down or get my confidence back, I’ll look for a task I started but didn’t finish that I could get completed in under 30 minutes. If I’m feeling really exhausted, I’ll look for something I can complete in 15 minutes.

How this helps: It will give you a feeling of being in control.

2. Give your mind a chance to wander.

Sometimes, to re-charge your creativity, you need to give your mind a chance to wander and free-associate.

When you do this, problems that seemed difficult can instantly become clearer. I like this strategy when I’m having trouble figuring out what should truly be my highest priority or when I’m overcomplicating solutions to problems.

Since I mostly work from home, I can run a personal errand or take a shower during the workday. Driving to the outlet mall or grocery store can really help me clear my head.

If you’re in a corporate job, or a situation in which you don’t have the flexibility to leave the premises, you can always pick an alternative, like finding a reason to wander to the other side of your campus, or doing a mindless but necessary task like photocopying a bunch of documents.

Tip: When using this strategy, I’ll often listen to a podcast to help break the cycle of ruminating about work. If you like psychology topics, then the Happier podcast by Gretchen Rubin and Liz Craft is a good one.

How this helps: It makes it easier to see the big picture and the easiest path forward, whereas continuing to bang away thinking about issues often doesn’t achieve that.

3. Do some work-related continuing education.

Sometimes, we need to refill our mental and emotional tanks rather than keep producing output. If I’m feeling a bit scattered, I often like to do some work-related reading. I’m typically not very goal-directed in how I do this. I’ll do things like scan through the table of contents of psychology journals and read some abstracts, or I’ll check Google Scholar and look up the latest work from researchers I like. Yesterday, I read a few chapters of a colleague’s book in bed.

By not being too goal-directed, I allow more and different types of connections to arise between what I’m working on and whatever I’m reading.

How this helps: It can help you feel like your mental ATM is getting deposits as well as withdrawals.

4. Make a brief list of what you’re not going to work on.

When you have a lot of ideas, it’s easy to feel guilty and anxious that you’re not working on all of them. Sometimes, you need to explicitly make a list of all the projects you’re not going to start or work on while you’re concentrating on your current highest priority.

How this helps: It makes it easier to focus and relieves guilt.

5. Do whatever is important but anxiety-provoking, and then allow yourself to take a break.

It’s easy to say that we should all work smarter rather than harder. Sometimes, to break a cycle of non-smart overworking, you need to do one thing that feels very hard and then let yourself take a break.

For me, this will often be a task that’s psychologically hard but not objectively hard or time-consuming. For example, making a request I feel anxious about.

Tip: Sometimes, just getting the ball rolling on an anxiety-provoking task is enough to help you feel less overwhelmed. You don’t necessarily need to complete the task. You can always do the first step and leave it at that for today.

How this helps: It gets you into the mode of working smarter rather than harder and relieves nagging anxiety about tasks you haven’t done.

6. Do the minimum necessary to get a task done.

There are all sorts of occasions where I make tasks more complicated or difficult than they need to be. For example, I’ll sit down to write an article and attempt to hit ten points when actually five points—or even three—is fine.

One of the biggest self-sabotaging thinking habits for anxious perfectionists is over-complicating solutions to problems. You imagine that what’s necessary to move forward is something more complicated or difficult than what it is in reality. Look for the simplest solution and take that road.

Want an update when I publish a new blog article? Subscribe here.

Similarly one may ask, how do you say you are overloaded at work?

Here are some guidelines to follow.

  1. Make it about quality. The way to frame this is that you don’t want to sacrifice quality in order to keep up a ridiculous level of output.
  2. Be concrete. Don’t just say you have too much work.
  3. Discuss deadlines and delegation.
  4. Stay positive.
  5. Ask for help.

Also, how can overload be overcome? 10 Steps To Conquering Information Overload

  1. Do a brain dump. Get things out of your head.
  2. Follow the two-minute rule.
  3. Clump together similar tasks.
  4. Don’t multitask.
  5. Limit the distractions of email.
  6. “Eat the frog” first thing in the morning.
  7. Spend only as much time on decisions, tasks and activities as they are worth.
  8. Take breaks.

Furthermore, how do you tell your boss you are overloaded?

Here are a few steps to take to tactfully address the fact that you simply have too much work.

  1. Step 1: Seek advice. Before approaching your manager, find someone you trust.
  2. Step 2: Host an honest sit-down.
  3. Step 3: Re-evaluate your time usage.
  4. Step 4: Prioritize your tasks.
  5. Step 5: Say no.

How do you deal with being overworked and underpaid?

  1. Research:
  2. List down your achievements:
  3. Formulate a salary request:
  4. Leave the job:
  5. Job search:
  6. Check your confidence:
  7. Use the right time:
  8. Know your boss criteria:

Divorce brings radical changes to your routine life and mental health. You need to be prepared to face and cope with them so that you will not get ruined the things you are left with after the split. Either you do a cheap divorce online or go through the full-stiffed divorce process with a family law attorney, it will have a crucial impact on your life processes.

Work is a place where you spend more than half of your routine life, so it is obvious that you won’t be able to keep your divorce and work apart. This threatens to bring you in the middle of office gossip issues. And even if you pretend you don’t bother how your colleagues discussing your personal issues at the lunch break, it may have a serious effect on your mental health anyway. So, your primary task is not to try to avoid it but try to cope with office rumors in the way which will preserve your mental health, personal life, and relationships at work at the same time.

Keep It to Yourself

You may be overloaded with legal divorce forms and other issues that are bursting over the verge but it is up to your interests to keep everything to yourself. Try to share neither news nor details on your divorce process as long as possible. Mind that telling your little secret to one of the colleagues will eventually end up with the whole office dwelling on your divorce details. So, you’d better keep quiet and keep the straight face. If your coworkers happen to notice the changes in your behavior and emotional state, you may answer in general phrases that you are just going through a difficult period and that is enough they need to know. Try to stay polite and distant enough not to offend someone and not let your colleagues in your private life as well.

Handle Your Emotions

Divorce issues are supplemented with emotions and feelings that are difficult to control. But bursting out in tears in the middle of the workday or storming out at your boss after the difficult court day are certainly the last things you need. So, you should find your own way not to let the emotions go over the brim.

  • Time for yourself – keeping a polite smile on your face throughout the day, when the storm of emotions is happening inside, is not possible even not in terms of divorce. So you need the time on your own to release the tension. Crying in the bathroom from time to time is not the best option. You’d better go out for lunch or take a walk around the office for a couple of minutes to cool off, mentioning a healthy lifestyle as an excuse for your coworkers.
  • A shoulder to cry on – you can choose the closest friend at the workplace to disclose some divorce details now and then during the lunch break, but don’t go into many details anyway. The sincere talk to the uninvolved person will help you relax a little bit and if the gossips spread you will know the source at least.
  • Professional help – professional mental support will do a lot for you, especially if you are using the diy divorce kit with no divorce specialist by your side. So, you are recommended to visit a therapist for at least a session or two so that you can settle your minds and not let your emotions interrupt your everyday life.

Once you will find your way of dealing with emotions you will have fewer chances to become the object of rumors in the office, so it is in your interests.

Find the Right Moment to Open the Truth

No matter how well you will handle your behavior and hide the situation, the time will come when the information leaks through the social media or any other source and it will spread around the office with the lightning speed. So, you’d better hurry up to provide relevant information not to let dirty guesses become common wisdom.

  • Talk with your boss – you can tell the boss from the very beginning since you may need excuses for court days. And ask to keep the news private. Or you may only notice that you have some deals with the court skipping the reason and tell the truth only when it’s all over. In any case, you don’t have to go into details.
  • Open up to your colleagues – it doesn’t mean you have to make pathetic announcements in front of the whole office. Just tell the news to one or two coworkers and the others will no soon. Don’t forget about keeping certain things private.

Opening the truth at the right time is a significant step. Since, if you don’t tell the news, your coworkers will invent and share information without your consent, which may have unpleasant results.

Leave Work Issues at Your Workplace

The plot of interaction between your divorce case and work life may go in different directions. The main thing is that it doesn’t have to become something significant in your life. Surely, you may take a break to settle your thoughts and emotions, but you will still have a chance to go through the gossip wave when you are back. In the end, the office rumors will jump to another topic soon and you will have nothing to be bothered about. The main thing is that you don’t bring work issues home and let it spoil your life. Moreover, you have got more significant issues to worry and care about that some words of distant people.