Turning down the flame when your blood boils.
Posted Aug 21, 2013
On my recent flight from Germany to the US, the man in front of me was so large that when he lay back in his chair, his head was practically in my lap. Not only could I barely open my computer to work, I had to do some maneuvering to eat my meal.
The flight attendant agreed that something was wrong with the chair and brought this to his attention. He said, “Too bad for her.”
The ongoing encounters with jerks are never-ending. It seems that the more people hide their heads in their phones, computers and personal space, the more insensitive everyone becomes, even those of us trying to be nice.
Unfortunately, the more I find myself feeling negative and angry, the more irritated I get with every jerk I encounter. Then I don’t extend warm and welcoming energy to the other people around me either.
Would you like to help put a stop to this vicious cycle? Here are seven tips for preserving your peace of mind when you encounter insensitive and rude people:
- Accept that being quiet does not mean being weak. You don’t always need to stand up for yourself especially if there is nothing you can do about a petty situation. Pick your battles wisely. Fighting the good fight needs more of your energy than the minor conflicts.
- Consider how silencing your reaction might shift the mind of the difficult person. Often people who react negatively regret their behavior when they calm down. But if you counter with negative energy, they are more likely stick to their story and justify their jerkiness. If instead you surprise them by shifting your attention elsewhere, you remove energy from the fight. They might give in once their ego is no longer involved.
- Manage your non-verbal behavior. If you are going to stay out of the fight, don’t roll your eyes, mutter under your breath or make an ugly face as you turn away. You are still sparking the fire with your gestures.
- The best thing to do is take a big breath, let it out slowly and focus on breathing comfortably. You are strong when you control your reactions. The disrespect the person is showing has nothing to do with you personally.
- Choose one word to anchor your mind until the need to react passes. Choose “compassion” or “tolerance” for the person who obviously is not happy. Choose “calm” for your own peace of mind. Say it over and over like a mantra until you feel the word flow through your body.
- Think more broadly. What will this matter tonight, tomorrow or into the future? What is more important to you, getting the last word in or living a long, healthy and somewhat peaceful life? Your health has more value than one-upping a jerk. Consciously and deliberately choose your reaction. This is your power. Don’t give it away.
- Regularly rest and rejuvenate. The more emotionally balanced you are, the less the jerks will trigger you.
There will be times you need to stand up for yourself. If you feel your reputation is at stake, or your soul needs you to speak your truth, please do so. But if reacting to a rude person is a waste of time, let it go. Not only do you increase your professionalism, you get better and better at balancing your energies.
Why are we supposed to stay silent?
I’m a little confused, why are good women supposed to stay silent and put up with bad behavior? Saying nothing can be very upsetting. Annoying people often have no idea that they are annoying. Politely pointing out a minor infraction often results in an apology and an adjustment.
By saying nothing one is encouraging and enabling bed behavior. That’s why we have so much of it.
- Reply to Anonymous
- Quote Anonymous
Mention first and then let go
You are right. If you noticed in my example, we did politely ask the man to adjust his seat. He rudely responded, “too bad for her.”
I agree that many people are clueless that they have stopped to talk and are blocking your path or something similar. They will often respond with an apology.
The behavior I’m talking about in the post (and I’m sorry if it wasn’t clear) is when people ignore you or react badly when you “point out a minor infraction.”
I have many stories where I politely let the person know their behavior was affecting me in some way and their response was off the charts rude. The surprise often stirs my adrenalin and I have a hard time not reacting badly in return. I don’t believe I’m the only one. I travel a lot. I see this scenario play out in airports all the time. And on roads where people are driving. In grocery stores. Just yesterday, at a government office.
So the message is to pick your battles once you know there is nothing else you can do but argue. Yes, please point out the impact of the person’s behavior. Hopefully, they will acknowledge their infraction. And if not, choose your next step with deliberation, not just emotion.
- Reply to Marcia Reynolds Psy.D.
- Quote Marcia Reynolds Psy.D.
That’s when I would have
That’s when I would have accidentally been a very sloppy eater, spraying his head with drink and bits of food, or started kicking his chair. Then he would move his sorry ass!
It’s true that throughout your life, you’ll be in some situations where you have to deal with people you just can’t stand. You might try to stay far away from these kind of people, but practically it’s impossible. You might get the most annoying boss, a restless worker, a submissive fan, a difficult client, a demanding in-law, and many more. No matter how much you try to run away and hide from this people you’ll often have to work with them, sometimes very closely. You can’t always be nice and professional with this people as you have to make yourself clear enough to be understood clearly which might translate into an inefficient communication that hampers entirely your plan and work related to them. Fortunately, all it takes is your patience and manner of dealing with them. It’s not going to be a horrifying experience but might challenge your patience and temperament. Let’s get to the ways to deal with most annoying people . Here we go..
1. Try to listen more
Most of the verbal fights are based on misunderstandings, so always make sure you’re getting everything clear. It becomes easy enough to deal with someone when they annoy you and the trick is to using every detail for careful questioning to prove them wrong and tune them out. However, poor listening leads to misunderstandings that needs clarification later which means spending more time with someone you really don’t want to be around.
2. Repeat everything
Repeat every question, instructions, norms and views to make them clear with what you say. Because if there will transparent communication between both sides, things will be easier for you to stand them. And, I’m sure everyone wants to save their time.
3. Hold your anger
The most important element to work on while you deal with annoying people is holding your anger. Try not to burst like a volcano as you never know your negative impact might strike you back real hard. Annoying people are really irritating hence you need ample patience to communicate with them. Remember, Newton’s 3 rd third law! “Every action has an equal and opposite reaction” .
4. Be calm and cool
While you hold your temperament, try to be cool and calm. Make yourself vulnerable to positive thoughts and energy. Breathe slowly and deeply and focus on each of your breath. Remember that you are capable to deal with all kind of people easily. Rather save your energy for even worst situations and conversations.
5. Be clear about your borderline
You don’t have to be friends with everyone which means you don’t have to do favours for everyone who asks for. If someone’s spoiling your time and disturbing you, simply tell them, “I know it’s really important to you but it simply isn’t a priority for me right now as I need to focus on my work.” When you deal with annoying people remember, never let anyone to feed on your time as you can’t be available for everything for everyone.
6. Counteract with ice to fire
If someone throws fire on you, be ready with ice and snow to neutralize the situation. Because you can’t calm down someone’s anger with your anger. You have to be smart to take things on a lighter note to avoid maximum conflicts ad brawls. Discuss the matter calmly and get back to whatever you were up to. Remember, when a person is in aggression, your rough and tough words might fire him/her more.
7. Close the door when needed
When you are consistently being irritated and annoyed by some attention seekers and pity seekers on social media or personally at your workplace and friends circle, simply close the door for them. There are many options to avoid them on social media, you can block, de-friend, unfollow them and if someone irritates you badly in personal make it clear to them to stay away from you.
8. Try not to impress everyone
You are not here to impress everyone. You can’t simply make everyone happy and content. If someone annoys you or irritates you, stop giving shit about it. Listen and avoid them and don’t take things personally if you really want to deal with annoying people .
9. Stop imagining and making stories
When someone is really trying to get under your skin, you obviously think too much to find out the reason why the person is doing so. You think about all the ways they are discomforting and disturbing you, how irritating they are and you just wait for them to do the next irritating thing that will throw you over the edge as you thought. Simply forget about people who have nothing to do with your life, rather focus what’s more important to you and what needs your real attention.
10. Get a nice excuse
We sometimes avoid being upfront with people as we don’t want to hurt their feelings and we are concerned of our words in anger will rise to explode all over them. So, if someone repeatedly annoy you, just tell them that you need to focus right now on something more important and you can may be talk later or tell them that you’re super tired and just in a bad mood, so you’re very sorry for not being completely available in the conversation.
11. Show them their irritability
This is sometimes the only thing you need to do when everything fails and challenges your patience badly. Give them that little taste of their own annoying trait with some similar examples to make them realize how annoying they are. It will be a nice wake-up call to deal with annoying people .
12. Never compete with them
Annoying people is impossible and they are inevitable too. So, no matter how much you try to deal with them with fire you can’t just get over them. They simply waste your energy. So, it’s better to let them win. Never compete with them as it’s totally worthless.
In this post, we may use links to the products we find helpful or cute.
We live in a social world, that’s obvious. And even if you don’t like people in general, the ability for humans to communicate is a miracle that led us to the world we have, and one can say that our world is pretty advanced.
But, since there are so many of us, it’s pretty easy to bump into someone who is so different that no matter how hard you try, you just can’t find a reason to like him or her. Moreover, the things this person says or does may even start to annoy you.
“Live and let live, don’t judge, take life as it comes and deal with it.” – someone once said. So let’s take a look at how to deal with annoying people once they come into your life!
How To Deal With Annoying People + Stay Calm Around Them
ARTICLE TOPICS (feel free to scroll down – the content starts below)
Why Do I Get Annoyed Easily?
There’s nothing wrong to be annoyed by other people – it’s practically impossible to like everyone, just as it’s impossible to be liked by everyone. And, well, let’s be honest – some people are simply jerks who don’t have a single grain of empathy and only care about themselves.
Usually, people get easily annoyed for reasons like:
- being sensitive to loud sounds and dynamic environments;
- general anxiety;
- stress and irritation;
- struggle to understand others or to be understood;
- negative thinking.
Why Are People Annoying?
People can be annoying for many reasons. Some of them simply don’t understand that they’re being annoying, others do that on purpose.
By watching an annoying person, you might even notice subtle signs that show why this person is so annoying:
- Maybe he or she is craving more attention because no one gave it to him or her in childhood.
- Maybe there’s a subtle sign of low confidence, or a need to be right in every situation.
- Maybe there’s strange neediness, or a case of racing thoughts that he or her needs to express, because they create restlessness.
None of this concerns you, but it can help you to look at the person from another point of view.
Think broadly and notice that you don’t really need to prove to someone your opinion – some people are just unable to accept a different view. And that’s totally fine! You know you, and that’s enough. You don’t need other people to agree with you, nor do you need to agree with other people to know what is right for you.
How To Deal With Annoying People When You Encounter Them
1. How do you respond to annoying people?
Don’t be afraid to be the silent one!
You might think that being silent means being weak, but in the case of annoying people, it’s usually one of the best ways to cope. Staying silent does not mean saying absolutely zero words, but instead – choosing to be in a more of a listener position.
If the person is annoying you, you can simply allow him or her to be the leading side of the conversation as this allows that person to load off the excess energy, but also protects your own. You probably won’t find any agreement points anyway, so it is best to let it be the way it is and accept the fact that this person might not be the one you like, including the words he or she say.
2. What do you do say to an annoying person?
Communicate without reacting.
If you let yourself to get into a reactive mode, you will probably get into a conflict. Now, there’s no reason to avoid conflict if someone is threatening you or is completely wrong about something that relates to you. It’s OK to stand up for yourself.
But if you feel like the person is just trying to annoy you on purpose, or if you simply disagree with what this person says, take a deep breath and try to not get reactive.
If you feel negative emotions rising (anger, resentment, annoyance or irritation), choose to not let those emotions in. Imagine them floating around, but not being a part of you. In other words – notice them, but try to separate from them and just let them be around.
Know that nothing and no one has an ability, or a right to disturb your inner peace. You have it, and it’s yours. You can always choose to simply observe the situation or other people, without getting entangled with what they say or do.
3. What do you do when someone is purposely annoying you?
Stay calm and do not fuel the fire with your body language.
Grins, rolling eyes and squinting may come out naturally when someone annoying is around, but, if noticed, they might spark an unnecessary conflict.
Don’t try to look protective too – crossed legs and arms show a sign of protectiveness and thus can send a subliminal message that you feel weak.
Instead, try to keep a calm and relaxed body position and a calm face. This sends a sign that you are not getting reactive, therefore an annoying person does not get agitated or provocative.
4. How do I stop getting annoyed so easily?
Stay actively learning how to deal with negative people.
If you often have to deal with annoying, manipulating, or irritating people, I highly recommend you to broaden up your spectrum and read a few books to learn more subtle and effective ways to deal with them. Here are a few that can help you a lot.
1. Learn how to deal with annoying people who are also difficult:
2. Learn how to deal with annoying people who also try to manipulate you:
3. Learn how to deal with annoying people who also happen to be your parents:
How To Deal With Annoying People: The Bottom Line
As you can see, the best way to deal with annoying people is by staying calm, not getting reactive, and not giving this person your energy by keeping a minimal conversation and a relaxed body language.
Try it once and you will notice that you always have a choice to not be influenced by other people.
If you find it hard to relax after being around an annoying person, mindfulness can be of great help. Here are a few of my tools that can help you with that:
Does your team get on like one big, happy family? Even if it does, there are bound to be times when there’s a clash. Whether it’s annoying habits or mannerisms, there are many ways that we can wind one another up at work. The question is, what can we do about it?
According to consultant and coach Ilene Marcus, we tend to respond to annoying behavior by instinct – and that’s not very helpful.
“Your blood pressure raises, your temperature raises, your breathing gets quicker, your heart rate raises, and your pupils get dilated. You’re already looking crazy,” she says. “When you’re in that mode you go into a fight-or-flight response. So you either come out swinging at this person: ‘Why are you doing this? This is not what the meeting is for’.” You start yelling. Or you freeze and say, ‘I’m done. We’re leaving. I’m packing up my toys and going home’.”
In addition to fight and flight, there’s another possible “F” response.
“Some people freeze,” she says. “Even when they’re the boss, they’re not really sure how to manage someone who is annoying them. So someone is doing something that is stopping the progress of the meeting, and the boss just doesn’t take control, and lets the whole meeting fall apart.”
Adapt Your Own Behavior
Although these reactions are natural and understandable, they can damage the motivation and productivity of your team, with a knock-on effect on your organization as a whole. Marcus recommends that managers adapt their own behavior, rather than try to change that of their team members, in order to tackle this.
“I firmly believe that it is the manager or the leader’s job to bring out the best in each worker, regardless of the circumstances,” Marcus tells me in our Expert Interview podcast. “As the boss, whether I’m leading or managing tasks, it’s my job to make sure that my team gets to the place they need to get, and I need to change my behavior to do that – to enable them to be able to be successful.”
So don’t fixate on this team member’s habit of interrupting, or that team member’s tendency to repeat herself. Instead, focus on turning around the negative relationship patterns that those habits create.
Prevent Energy Suck
In her book “Managing Annoying People,” Marcus presents seven proven tactics for doing that. The first is “prevent energy suck,” and she illustrates this with a personal anecdote about a team member who always needs a one-on-one chat after every meeting.
For a busy manager like Marcus, this eats up precious time. But, her team member believes these interactions are necessary. She’s an important and valued contributor, so there’s a balance to be struck.
“I have to find a way to manage my relationship with her so I can meet her need of feeling engaged and having more time to explore the issues, but I can meet my need of not having my energy drained by these meetings,” Marcus explains, adding that, “the most important thing to do in this situation is not to avoid.”
Her solution is to give the team member what she wants, but with clear, stated boundaries.
“I need to say to her, ‘I love meeting with you but I have a time constraint, so we have 15 minutes to have this meeting today’,” Marcus says.
Sometimes, she includes other people in these post-meeting conversations, explaining, “It’s much less annoying when I can spread out the work and include someone else, because then we can get some other stuff done, too. It’s not just her agenda.”
Limit the Annoying Team Member
This example illustrates another tactic from the book: guard your time. If you put a limit on the time you spend with the annoying team member, you minimize the annoyance, and you are more likely to spend that time productively.
Marcus’s favorite tactic is, “Know busy is better, for the greater good.” In this audio clip from our Expert Interview podcast, she tells the story of a team member who regularly generated unrequested sales reports to promote her own division. How did Marcus handle this “annoying superstar?”
Listen to the full Expert Interview in the Mind Tools Club ¦ Install Flash Player
How do you deal with annoying people? Join the discussion below!
Something that we struggle with daily, that eats us up and causes stress and anger: annoying people. You know those people. They cut in line, are rude to you in the office or at the restaurant, cut you off in traffic, talk loudly about obnoxious things, play loud music when you’re trying to concentrate, interrupt you, and so on.
This post originally appeared on Zen Habits .
These offenses are violations of the way you think people should act. And so it burns you up. Don’t worry, I’m the same way. If you just keep letting these offensive people get to you, you’ll always be mad or annoyed. Life won’t be very good. But it’s something you can learn to deal with.
Top 10 Ways to Deal with Life’s Most Annoying People
Let’s level for a second: there are some people in the world that are just plain annoying. From the
I have to admit I’m not perfect at this, but here are three strategies I use that are helpful:
I learned this one from Zen teacher Robert Thomas , who uses “Get Big” as one of his slogans that helps him to be mindful. Imagine you’re a 2-year-old toddler who can’t have a toy or some ice cream right this minute. This problem is your entire universe, because you have no perspective, and so you throw a fit. This is the world of a 2-year-old (I should know, I’ve had six of them). But as adults, we know that this is a very small problem, and in fact there are lots of other things the 2-year-old could do to be happy.
Sure, that’s easy for us—we have a bigger perspective. But when someone offends us, we have a small perspective. This little offense is the biggest thing in the world, and it makes us very angry. We throw the equivalent of a 2-year-old fit. But if we get a bigger perspective (“Get Big”), we can see that this little thing matters very little in the bigger picture. It’s not worth being angry over. So remind yourself to “Get Big,” then widen your perspective.
Float Down the Stream
When I drive and other drivers do rude things, I often get angry . Then I remember a trick: I imagine myself floating down a stream in a raft, and the other cars are just twigs and leaves floating past me one way or another on this stream. They don’t have to treat me a certain way, because they’re just twigs. And so I serenely float down this stream, not worrying about how the twigs float around me (though I try not to hit them, because, you know, safety first). And in truth, this is how life is—other people aren’t trying to offend you, don’t even worry about you most of the time. They are just twigs floating by. Be nice to the twigs though.
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Give Them a Mental Hug
This little trick can transform the way I feel about someone who makes me angry. Let’s say someone has just said something rude to me. How dare they! Don’t they have any consideration for my feelings? But of course, in this reaction, I’m not having any consideration for their feelings—only mine matter. So I try to empathize with this rude person, and realize that they’re angry, or scared, or both. They are being rude as a coping mechanism for their fear. And so, mentally (and once in a while physically), I give them a hug. I have compassion for this scared person, because I too am often scared. We’re the same. We need a hug, some compassion, a little love.
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Try one of these three tricks the next time someone makes you mad or offends you. And then smile in serenity, armed with the comforting knowledge that, like me, you are superior to the rest of the world.
Leo Babauta is the creator and writer of Zen Habits. He’s married with six kids, lives in San Francisco (previously Guam ), and is a runner and a vegan. Read more about him: My Story .
We’re both familiar with irritating, frustrating and annoying people. Learning how to deal with them is an art-form, because what works for me, may not work for you.
There are a lot of facets that come into play when someone is annoying you. Are they bothering you, because you genuinely don’t think they ‘vibe’ with you? Or, is the universe sending someone to show you what you have to work on?
If you only take one thing away from this article, let it be this: honesty always works.
There’s no need to be unnecessarily blunt about it, but if someone becomes too pushy, you have to be honest about what’s going on and let them know. It sucks, but if you value your time, it has to be done, and it doesn’t have to be done in a harsh manner.
Ignoring has to be one of the most common strategies you see people use. It can work well, but if the person is persistent, you can’t ignore them for long.
Dealing with annoying people is always easier the more comfortable you are in your skin. If someone is bothering you, the best way to stop it is to tell the person, which I will talk about in a second.
- Being Nice
The first response we have is to be nice towards everyone. Being negative in any way is frowned upon, but what most forget is that telling the truth is more important than being nice. You have to respect yourself.
Telling the truth doesn’t mean being rude or obnoxious in any way. You have to find your own groove, but chances are that you have to tell people what you think if you’ve got a small crowd bothering you all the time.
- Being Honest
If nothing else works, tell the person exactly what you feel. Again, being overly harsh is unnecessary. Just telling someone that you don’t want to hang out with them right now is not the end of the world.
This takes some courage, but in the end, it is the most honest and simple way to deal with the situation. Luckily, most people don’t need to be told, because they are smart enough to pick up subtle hints that you aren’t interested.
Think about when you were last bothering someone; did they tell you to go away in a particularly effective and nice way?
The way I often learn new things is by flipping the roles. If I want to learn how to tell people to go away, I look inside and think about if I’ve ever been in a position where someone else wanted me to go away, especially if it worked.
Learning how to deal with annoying people is uncomfortable, because if you care about others, you want to be nice. It’s your first instinct, and that’s cool, but it doesn’t always work.
When it becomes a problem is if you’re giving your time away to someone you don’t want to. Sometimes it takes more than being nice to resolve a problem in your life.
The next time you’re in a situation like this, think about your options and the consequences they have.
Sometimes things aren’t what they seem, and most important of all, often the person you’re annoyed by is there to show you where you need to focus internally.
Let’s level for a second: there are some people in the world that are just plain annoying. From the guy that parks in your spot all the way up to the boss that does everything he can to make your life miserable, we all have to deal with horrible people once in awhile. Here’s how to do it best.
10. The Grocery Store Douchebag
It’s a small annoyance to be sure, but there’s always that one person at the grocery store who just grinds your gears. The guy who steals your parking spot, then takes the last box of Dunkaroos , then cuts in line in front of you. If you aren’t the uber-patient type, we’ve shared some tips about how to deal with an asshole parker and how to deal with people that cut in line . Though if it actually is the same person that does both of those things, they’re probably just a jerk and you’re better off stealing their Dunkaroos.
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9. The Sloppy Roommate
Finding a good roommate can be a crapshoot. Sometimes, you just end up with a slob and have to learn to live with it . But, before you get all huffy, try to solve things amicably. There are a lot of things you can do to make the situation better (and become a better roommate yourself). Of course, if it gets really bad, then you can think about evicting them . Photo by Diego Cervo (Shutterstock).
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8. The Negative, Irrational Arguer
Whether is one of your close friends or that guy in your office that just wants to pick a fight, we all know someone who’s overly negative and just likes to argue. Dealing with their negativity is the first step to cohabitation, but once they actually get you roped into an argument, you’re on different ground. In those cases, you’re better off getting out of the argument rather than spurring it on, no matter how irrational they are (and no matter how much you know you’re right ). Though. you should make sure you are right, first. Even a broken clock is right twice a day. Photo by Jinga (Shutterstock).
How to Deal with Negative People
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7. The Overbearing Family Member
No matter how much you love your family (or friends), we all know a few people that can just get a little high maintenance from time to time and stress you out. The best thing you can do is set clear boundaries so they don’t get under your skin too much. But, seeing as that isn’t always an option, you’ll also need to learn how to deal with that kind of stres s when you’re forced to be around them for long periods of time. Just remember to choose your battles wisely . Photo by Lisa F. Young (Shutterstock).
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6. The Chronically Late Friend
Sometimes, even our best friends can be annoying. We probably all have at least one friend that’s late to everything, and while it seems like a minor annoyance, it can occasionally cause bigger problems—not to mention it’s just plain rude. You guys have offered a lot of suggestions for dealing with chronically late friends , and if you’re feeling a little evil, you can go radio silent to really teach them a lesson. We’ve also talked about how to fix your own chronic lateness , and you might offer some of that advice to your friends as well—but be sure not to sound like a jerk when you do it . Photo by Mark Ramsay .
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5. The Noisy Neighbor
From wall-vibrating dubstep to loud late night sex, noisy neighbors always suck. Unfortunately, it’s something you’ll have to deal with at some point in your life if you live in apartment buildings. The best way to deal with a noisy neighbor is to just talk to them nicely. Often, they might not realize how loud they are, and would be happy to stop. If that isn’t possible, you can take slightly more covert measures , or just contact the authorities. Or you could transmit your music to their speakers and really freak them out. Or just have even louder sex. Title image remixed from an original by Tomasz Trojanowski (Shutterstock).
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Top Ten Comebacks for People who Keep bothering You
Dealing with annoying people is an inevitable part of life. There will be times you need to stand up for yourself and times when it is better to walk away. After all, you don’t have to attend every argument you are invited to.
Difficult people usually have the same behaviour around other people, not just you. You can start wondering why this is happening to you, but it is their problem. They probably have many difficult relationships in their life.
If someone is continually bothering you, it is important to set boundaries and let the person know. You can let them know what you find acceptable, what you don’t, and what you are not willing to tolerate.
Maya had spent a year dealing with her negative father who would contradict everything she said and continually make negative judgments about her life. She had learned to stop reacting to the criticism, but when her father crossed the line, she always had a few one-liners in her pocket to let her dad know his behaviour was not OK.
Here are some snappy comebacks to let the person know that you want to be left alone.
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Top Ten Comebacks for People who Keep bothering You
- Please do not disturb I am disturbed enough already.
- Please don’t interrupt me while I’m ignoring you.
- How do I block you in real life?
- You’re like a hemorrhoid, a pain the ass who won’t go away.
- If I throw a stick, will you go away?
- No…you’re not bothering me. In fact, I stopped listening to you about 10 minutes ago!
- You go girl! And don’t come back!
- Don’t think of it as goodbye. Think of it as a chance to stop bothering me.
- Go away, I’m too sober to deal with you.
- Please go away I’m introverting.
Be prepared next time you have to deal with someone who keeps bothering you
If you have to deal with someone who keeps bothering you for everything and who gives you a hard time, our bundle Snappy Comebacks any Situation can help you out. Be prepared for difficult people with clever responses on your phone or device any time or anywhere.
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At some point in your career, you’ll undoubtedly cross paths with colleagues that irk you. Maybe it’s the presumption that their opinions are the only correct ones on the planet or their blatant brown-nosing to get on the boss’ good side. Perhaps you can’t stand how their arrogance, moodiness or quick temper puts a damper on the company culture.
Difficult co-workers can high-jack your emotions. They trigger something in you that causes you to almost act or think irrationally , which is not exactly a healthy situation in which you can succeed. You may find that sooner or later your exasperation expands until every little thing that person does makes you want to tear your hair out.
Unfortunately, in the case of annoying co-workers, you can’t simply remove them from your life. Avoiding them around the office or circumventing one-on-one meetings probably won’t work either.
Fortunately, there’s a way to put a positive spin on the situation that stems from a counter-intuitive insight about dealing with difficult people. When we discern a quality in someone else that irks us, we can benefit from pausing to examine exactly why we have that reaction and look more closely at what it can teach us about ourselves.
The friction of interacting with an annoying co-worker actually presents a chance to cultivate essential leadership skills like assertiveness, self-awareness and confidence. It can provide an unexpected opportunity for personal growth that goes far beyond solely testing the limits of your patience.
Whether it’s the copywriter who incessantly talks to you about her family drama or the account executive who steals food from the company fridge, we’ve all dealt with annoying co-workers in the office at some point or another.
Of course, colleagues who drive you crazy also pose a problem: How do you deal with them without leaving a bad impression?
Have no fear, because we’ve searched the great depths of the web to find the best resources on handling those pesky people in the office. You’ll be a work relationships master in no time.
- Trust me, you’re not alone: Here are the 15 most annoying co-workers ever (and, shocker: Everyone deals with them). (LinkedIn)
- Building on that, there are definitely ways to handle each individual infuriating co-worker case; it’s not one-size-fits-all. (DailyWorth)
- If you’re worried that you’re the only person dealing with a frustrating colleague, don’t be; research found that one in eight people leave a job due to “incivility.” (Entrepreneur)
- It’s easy to reach a breaking point with loud, gossipy colleagues, so drown them out with these five awesome apps. (Fast Company)
- Sometimes when you’re dealing with an obnoxious team member, it’s best to find a bigger enemy. (Inc.)
- If you’re dealing with a perpetually late co-worker, here’s the fix you’ve always been waiting for: the Whisky Rule. (Lifehacker)
- Obviously, it’s easy to be annoyed with other people, but it’s also important to take a step back and think about what irritating office habits you have that drive others crazy. (Forbes)
- All in all, look on the bright side: Your co-worker isn’t as awful as David Thorne. (Elite Daily)
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